Today’s post is just a prayer and my thoughts. I apologize for my followers that I haven’t been posting consistently but my schedule has been insane. I’m trying to finish school and also I got the first three chapters of Dewdrops and Butterflies sent to my Alphas on Saturday, so between the nerves of what they’ll think and the editing the other chapters, it been pretty crazy.
Thank you for reading when I do post y’all. I appreciate you.
Dear God, hi. It’s me. Thank you for today. Thank you for taking care of us and keeping us safe.
Thank you God that there’s more to You than we can see. That you’re beyond this world.
Laying here in bed at night, when I close my eyes, I leave my body. This tired being that holds me back, gets hurt, strained, needs to be exercised and has food sensitivities.
When I close my eyes I’m just me. By myself. Not the face with messy hair, or the sore muscles or the tired mind. I’m… outside of this. Im more than my body.
And then people ask, “How can you place all your trust in something you’ve never seen with your eyes, of felt with your skin? How can you leave everything you’re made of in the hands of something you’ve never heard with your ears?”
Sometimes I want to laugh, and sometimes I’m sad for them. How hard do their hearts have to be that when they close their eyes at night, they don’t understand the beauty of life and the beauty beyond life?
They don’t feel that they are not their body. That they just live in it. How much hard covering has coated their hearts and souls that they don’t FEEL that they are more then their tired limbs in a bed.
That’s all I feel, when I lay down. I hear myself breathing, I thank You for each breath, and I know that this is for such a short time. You are coming!
It hurts me inside, some little bit, that so many people don’t feel You there, smiling down on them, Your love overflowing, grace upon grace, as You listen to them.
But the other part of me, I’m so excited. I can’t wait to see Your glorious face clearly. To thank You audibly for everything You gave for me. To see into Your eyes and know that despite all the sin I lay at your feet every night and like the wretched child I am I beg you to wash me clean anew before I start to lay my personal requests and build my relationship with You, in my heart of hearts, I LOVE You. It hurts me and makes me mad when I do what’s wrong, and it hurts me that I do it anyway, over and over, every night I have to bring a big load of sins back again and ask you to take care of them.
But THANK YOU Lord, that You are so merciful and loving and I can count on the fact that you will take those sins off my back, and rinse me clean again with the blood You shed for me while I was still a sinner. Thank you that I can continue my relationship with You built up and keep building because you push aside everything I’ve done against You and You know my heart. You… Thank You that You are GOD. And that You as God have paid the price that I can reach up and I can touch you with my soul, and be refreshed, and made new and strengthened for the next day.
Thank you Jesus my Lord for loving me unconditionally.
I love you God. I love You so much and I want to do what’s right.
Strengthen me by Your spirit.
Thats all today girls. Have a good week. Seek God with ALL your heart and He will be found of you.